editor advice Archives

This article by Joanne Grant is from the January 2021 edition of Nink, the monthly newsletter of Novelists, Inc. (NINC). Nink, which is packed each month with informative articles for career novelists, is a benefit of NINC membership.

“What’s the fuss all about?” she asked, quizzically.

There are lots of “rules” in writing and with them a hive of opinions and debates. In this article I am going to bravely wade in with some thoughts on the dialogue tag “rule,” which is this: only use the verb “said” unless absolutely necessary. Now the chances are, you will have strong feelings about this use of said, and are firmly in the “for” or “against” camp. However, if you’ve never given it much thought until now, then I want to say “I’m sorry!” Because it seems that when it comes to the humble verb “said” there is actually a lot to be “said” about it!

So what is the fuss all about? I am here to put your mind at rest, offer up some tips and suggestions, and I promise, there won’t be a “rule” in sight. Let’s start by looking into the basic arguments between using “said” versus more descriptive verbs in dialogue tags.

Put simply, a dialogue tag serves to show the reader who is speaking. It is a tool to orientate the reader and smooth their passage through the story.

Against
Purists who argue for the use of “she/he/they said” only, do so because they believe anything else detracts away from the dialogue, action and intrudes on the story. Dialogue tags are functional and therefore should be “invisible” to the reader. There is also an additional argument that the use of alternative verbs, or heaven forbid, an adverb (see article tagline!) is at the best amateurish, or at the worse, just plain wrong.

For
On the flip side, those in the for camp could argue that relying on plain old “she/he/they said” is well, boring! It is creatively limiting when there is a wealth of verbs just longing to be whispered, muttered or shouted—why wouldn’t you want to pepper your prose with a little more flavour?

But which side am I on?
This argument made me think back to my school days where we were encouraged to find creative alternatives to “said” to expand our vocabulary and pep up our creative writing. I am sure the results were indeed “amateurish” and I can’t help but wonder whether the cringeworthy results of this language exercise have left a scar on some writers!

But as an editor, what do I think about dialogue tags? To be honest, I have never felt that strongly about them. That is because when they’re handled well, I hardly notice them—if they don’t bother me, I don’t bother them! I completely agree that their role is functional and can be near on invisible to the reader, but when I do notice them it’s usually because:

There is a lack of them and I have lost track of who is speaking—very annoying!
or
They jump out at me by being ill placed, irrelevant, or just plain bizarre!—and ruin the flow of the story.

Now, my research shows that not all editors will feel as neutral as I do about dialogue tags. This suggests that it is rather a question of personal taste, which is why rules simply cannot exist—it is subjective. As a writer, therefore, how do you navigate this potentially divisive terrain?

Research
I always advise that you research the conventions of the genre you are targeting to give you a flavour of not only content, but also details such as verb usage in dialogue tags. Notice how they are executed, how frequently and whether it is a quirk of the writer, or if there is a convention across the genre. And if you find yourself reading for research but forgetting to notice dialogue tags, it’s likely because they have been handled beautifully. Go back and read with more detail to spot them!

Purpose and techniques
Once you’ve identified the preferred usage of dialogue tags it’s time to apply your learnings. Whether you’re in the “for” or “against” camp, it is still important to communicate clearly what your character is saying. The following examples can help you execute your chosen dialogue tag in an effective way.

Redundant tags
If you’re thinking of using a more descriptive verb or adverb, question whether they add information or meaning that isn’t obvious through dialogue and action. If nothing is added, it is likely redundant and you are in the dangerous territory of telling what you have already shown. Here is an example:

She slammed the door and glared at him. “How dare you talk to me like that?” she asked angrily.

The addition of the dialogue tag in this instance is redundant: “asked” due to the punctuation and “angrily” because it is clear from her actions that she is angry. As a result, the dialogue tag just adds words and potentially slows the pace of whatever the response will be. Using this type of action, followed by the dialogue can help eliminate the need for a dialogue tag entirely.

Aural tags
Whereas, if you want the reader to hear the dialogue and appreciate the volume of what is being said, for example, an aural tag such as “whispered,” “muttered,” or “shouted” can help. Not only can this bring dialogue to life in a way that isn’t obviously communicated through dialogue or action, it alters the meaning too.

There is a big difference between:

“I hate you!” she shouted.

“I hate you!” she whispered.

Obviously, the action around the dialogue will help to fill in the blanks, but If you were a purist, and simply went with “she said” then the action would have to do most of the talking. After all, the meaning of the words can be changed entirely depending on how they are delivered.

As you can see, there isn’t a right or wrong way! And plumping for “she/he/they said” only is actually more difficult that it may appear! Whatever side you end up on, and let’s be honest, there is a hybrid option available, it is all about finding what’s right to your author voice as well as the genre of fiction you are writing, and then finding a match with an editor who feels the same.

I appreciate it takes skill from the writer to execute tags in such a way that they fulfill their function and play an unobtrusive role and seamlessly bring the dialogue alive, but I can honestly say that I have never passed on a submission because dialogue tags—and you can quote me on that!

________________________

Joanne Grant is an Editorial Coach with over 16 years of expertise working for the global publisher Harlequin. Joanne has edited hundreds of romance novels over the years and understands how to coach authors of all genres to deliver their best work. If you’re interested in finding out how she can help you achieve your writing goals, get in touch – Joanne loves to chat! For inspiration, tips and offers why not sign up to her newsletter, join her Facebook group Motivation for Writers! or connect on Twitter @JoanneMGrant.

This article by Joanne Grant is from the December 2020 edition of Nink, the monthly newsletter of Novelists, Inc. (NINC). Nink, which is packed each month with informative articles for career novelists, is a benefit of NINC membership.

As an acquiring editor, I’ll be honest and say nothing would have me skim-reading over a submission quicker than lengthy descriptions of setting – especially in the very first paragraph of novel. However, passages of lyrical scene-setting prose were once the stalwart of classic novels which are still revered and taught in schools and universities today. So, what has changed, and is it really a complete no-no to include lyrical passages of setting at any point in your novel?

Creating a world in which your reader feels they can step into can make the difference from an okay read to a fantastic read—whereas not enough setting can disorientate the reader and leave them frustrated. It’s a hard balance to make but an important one!

In this article, I will discuss ways to identify how to handle world-building in your novel in a way that will appeal to your reader, as well tips to execute this well.

The 21st Century reader

Recent studies have shown that in the last 20 years, attention spans have dropped significantly. This is in direct correlation to the amount of information that is readily available and always vying for our attention (whether we want it or not!), through our smart phones, for example. It is perhaps of no surprise that this would have an impact on reading habits, trends, and in the way stories are told.

But does this mean readers no longer have the patience for description and world-building in novels? Not entirely, as it all depends on who your target reader is and what reading experience they are looking for – how do they want to feel? Being mindful of who your reader is when crafting your story can help you to world-build in a way they will enjoy. But how can you do this when you are second-guessing the whims of individuals?

Establish the role of setting in your genre

When looking to target your reader, first hone in on the type of book you are writing. There is so much variety in storytelling that thankfully, books are curated for us. Genres, sub-genres, and even broader categories are broken down into themes, tone, etc., all with the view to help readers navigate the bookshelves to select a story and reading experience they are in the mood for.

Read voraciously in the genre you are writing and pay specific attention to the conventions of that genre when it comes to world-building. The way world-building is handled in a category romance will differ from a post-apocalyptic sci-fi or from that in a literary family saga, for example, so notice the style, length and word choice when it comes to creating setting. Also notice:

Is it mainly told through narrative description or through character point of view?
Is the convention to use backdrop setting (more common in charcter-driven stories) or integral settings?
How do the descriptions of setting effect pace?
Pay particular attention to how setting is handled in the opening chapter – this is where you will win or lose your reader!

Trends change, so it is important to research current examples of the genre you are writing in – not just the authors who are considered masters in the genre, even if they are still publishing today. Why? Because they are likely selling books based on their unique storytelling style and have a loyal fanbase; they have earned the right to flaunt conventions! Instead, turn your attention to the new and rising stars coming through in your genre of choice.

Now that you have established the current convention and readers’ expectations of how setting is executed in your genre, how do you successfully execute your setting?

Using your setting with purpose

Everything you write (or at least what makes it into your final draft!) must have purpose: by serving the characters, conflicts, plot, and by revealing something new, interesting, and integral to the story. To avoid slipping into descriptive passages your reader skims over, consider the purpose of setting at that point in your novel. Here are some examples where setting can be used to serve a specific purpose beyond simple scene-setting:

Giving context and boundaries for your characters and their actions
Creating atmosphere and mood, which in turn can influence or reflect character mood
Providing foreshadowing of events
Creating a theme through symbolism

Whatever the conventions of your genre, it is unlikely that your setting will be “told” entirely through passages of narrative prose which means – yes, you guessed it – the way to execute this in an engaging way is to “show” setting through character action, dialogue and interaction!

As an editor – do I think the art of lyrical prose has gone completely out of fashion? No, not at all. I have read some fantastically engaging books published in recent years that used world-building in a poetic way to amplify or contrast with the themes of the story, or to slow the pace, or to make a wider point on a theme.

But why was I more forgiving of these stories as reader compared to my impatient skim-reading as an acquiring editor? It all comes down to reader expectations. I had the specific conventions of the genre I was acquiring for front of mind, and I knew that lengthy setting descriptions were not what the reader would be looking for.

So, if you find yourself writing a beautiful passage of evocative mood-setting, heavy with symbolism, ask yourself: based on your research is this what your reader wants…or is it exactly what turns them off? And this will help world-build successfully for the 21st Century reader.

________________________

Joanne Grant is an Editorial Coach with over 16 years of editorial expertise working for the global bestselling publisher Harlequin. Joanne has edited hundreds of romance novels over the years and understands how to coach authors of all genres to deliver their best work. If you’re interested in finding out how she can help you achieve your writing goals, get in touch – Joanne loves to chat! For inspiration, tips and offers why not sign up to her newsletter, join her Facebook group Motivation for Writers! or connect on Twitter @JoanneMGrant.

Nink: Dialogue Tags

Nink ~ World Building for the 21st Century Reader: The death of lyrical prose?

BEST OF NINK

BEST OF NINK

Connect with us